A Girls' Slumber Party

A certain little girl needs some help identifying as part of the sisters--the girls--in the family, as opposed to only as part of "the big kids" (in contrast to "the babies") in the family. Therefore, Chris and I have been hatching plans for how to encourage warm, loving play between the sisters instead of fighting, rejection, and tears.

One plan we've been working involves giving out Reward Bucks. Right now the children are each working on increasing different virtues (slaying various vices) specific to each child. The girls receive a Reward Buck when I catch them playing inclusively and lovingly with each other, or using loving, polite words with the other. There is a specific outing they're "earning" with their bucks. I figure that if the Catholic spiritual writers describe virtue as simply good behavior become habitual, then we need to literally practice the habits of these good behaviors until we adopt them. (It strikes me that the Catholic view of developing a virtue isn't much different from the principle I understand to be behind Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: do the right behavior over and over again regardless of how you feel and eventually your mind/cognition will change to match the behavior because the brain hates cognitive dissonance.)

Mary and Ann with Margaret and Sally

My idea tonight was the most fun so far: a slumber party!

"Girls, we're going to have a mini-slumber party."

"What is a slumber party?"

After I explained, I asked if the girls wanted me to get out the sleeping bags. Mary leapt with joy, "Just get out one sleeping bag! I want us to sleep together so we can play tickle toes!"

How precious is that? My plan was already working. How fast we go from refusing to sleep in the same room together to wanting to sleep in the same sleeping bag!

We ate delicious, fancy cookies--in their bedroom!--while listening to fun music. Then I asked what "girl story" we should read, and Raggedy Ann was chosen.

We said our prayers, I tucked them in, and that brief, special "party" was it. I sat in the next room listening to the two little girls lying in bed, chattering away to each other, giggling madly, and it was such a different, loving sound than usual. Praise God!

Two sisters, asleep at their slumber party

Perhaps a Sisters' Tea Party should be in the works next . . .

*****

Edited the next day to show that, after Mary creating many "Mama and Mary" pictures, she created her first "Margaret and Mary" drawing. Also, Mary created a slumber party for her best doll (Mary Avalyn) and Margaret's best doll (Sally). I see sister-love growing!