We have been absent from our family blog for one month
exactly as our son Thomas was diagnosed with cancer. We were publishing over at
CaringBridge (https://www.caringbridge.org/visit/thomaslauer/), but
are now going to try to bring the two together seamlessly in order to continue
the family blog I have written for 14 years. This blog post is copied from
CaringBridge and is being published retroactively.
Even though I woke up at 5:00 weeping, the same way I fell asleep, and I wanted to lay on the sofa with leaden limbs, I decided to take my 7:00 exercise walk, because I thought the little bit of normalcy would help me be a stronger mother for Thomas today. Anyway, God gave me a consolation as I trudged our cul-de-sac and little street in circles: the twin fawns recently born here were out prancing and frolicking. Their mom stayed hidden almost the entire half hour and the fawns were not afraid of me, so they just pranced all around me the entire time, which provided distraction and a simple meditation that God is good. This morning, that was all the prayer I could manage to lift my mind toward: God is good.
We had a relaxed morning and left at 10:00 for the hospital. Thomas gathered his own items and brought them to me: "All I need are my holy things, my stuffed animals, my books, and my mama!"
He had been excited since the prior evening--the way a four-year-old squinches up tight, squeals, and says yay!--to go back to the hospital and to see Miss Haley, the Child Life Specialist in pediatric oncology. What a consolation to our parents' heart, as I can only imagine the pain of dragging him to the hospital crying and resisting. Thank you, Jesus.
After the traumatic, four-time attempt to insert an IV on Monday, our great prayer for today was that the IV placement would be easy. In fact, it was effortless. The team was encouraging and Miss Haley is very respectful of Thomas. When he said he didn't want the J-Tip (which injects anesthesia without a needle and makes a loud pop-can sound noise), the team believed Thomas. He personally would rather feel the needle prick than hear the noise. He practiced the slow, deep breathing I've been coaching him on. The team respected that Thomas likes to watch and ask questions and have it explained to him, so nobody tried to make him watch an iPad. It took the nurse one try and Thomas did not cry one tear.
Thomas is keeping his IV in place overnight at home so he does not have to have one placed again tomorrow.
We had so many people praying for the specific prayer intention of an easy IV during the 10:30 hour. Numerous people I know were literally on their knees in front of altars with lit candles. One 6-year-old I know was making a sacrifice for Thomas. I know there were innumerable others praying that I'll never know about. Thank you.
After that he had some labs drawn and then we walked over to Nuclear Medicine for an injection to prepare him for his scan tomorrow. Miss Nicole in Nuclear Medicine had been working there for 20 years and was really kind and sweet. We had to sit for an hour in between two medications, during which time she loaded us up with snacks and we watched "The Boxcar Children."
Thomas was simply full of joy. He is such a happy child and I don't say that like all children are happy because they have different temperaments, just like adults.
On our way out, Miss Nicole let Thomas tour the Very Fancy Camera.
We will be back, very early in the morning for a Very Long Day.
Specific prayer request for Thursday: Please pray that the cancer is operable and localized (not spread) and is of the least aggressive cell type.
Gratitude List:
I am grateful to my 11-year-old: I thought all the little boys slept all night last night (David's second time ever in his life!), but it turns out Thomas was awake 1:30-3:00 a.m. and Mary heard him and helped him without waking me. What a dear! (Although I told her next time to wake me!)
I'm grateful to Instacart workers who shop for and deliver groceries.
I'm grateful to the E. family who delivered our meal tonight. That allowed me to come home from the hospital and just putter and clean while my emotions worked themselves out instead of cooking.
I'm grateful for the St. Jude candle Thomas's godparents mailed him.
I'm grateful for the homemade bread and St. Joseph oil (from oratory where Andre Bissette was) dropped off to us by the F. family.
I'm grateful to my husband who came home from our day at the hospital, put in some hours at work, and then invited our 7-year-old out to toss a baseball around "just because" (knows he needs special attention right now).
I'm grateful to a young lady who offered to be another babysitter for us.
I'm grateful for the beautiful flowers sent to us by my father-in-law.
I'm grateful to my sister-in-law who drove from Texas, arriving today, to help for about a week.
1.) That 7:00 exercise walk is self-care for you. Try to keep it up as much as you can as it will give you some reserves to deal with the situation.
ReplyDelete2.) It sounds like you've learned my secret: know your veins. The lab staff have stopped giving me a strange look when I show them the vein to poke. I also learned the hard way that any IV needs to be in my non-dominant hand/arm because they *WILL* infiltrate in my dominant hand.