Reading Recommendation: "Gel-Pen Faith"

I'd like to direct my readers to another blog post entitled "Gel-Pen Faith" because it captures so much of my experience and belief.

Having these children has stretched me more--in faith, in competence, in diligence, in childlike dependence on God--than I would ever have stretched myself!

And some days--many, many days lately--I have to repeat to myself that I am a "good mother" if I do the process of meeting the duties of my vocation, not based on the outcome. If I work diligently, I have been a good homemaker, even if the mess never can be truly conquered while four children live and homeschool in this house and my husband travels for work a lot. If I have a well-reasoned discipline plan in place with my husband and I stop what I am doing to execute the discipline no matter how often it is needed, then I've been a dedicated mother, even if my children still choose with their free wills to behave badly.

Saying this is way easier for me than believing it.

A lot of days, I'm hanging on to my fingernails to believe I am doing my duties here because I think the outcome should look perfect yet we are so far from it. Chris can attest to my near despair at times--something with which I'm sure many mothers can identify.

"This is a pattern. I felt capable of being a mother, back before I was. God gave me more to handle than I could possibly handle on my own strength. I felt capable of keeping house. I’m sorry. I don’t know if I can stop laughing about that. Anything that I felt capable of doing,  God will both make it seem impossible and simultaneously ask me to do it. And there I am – in the sweetest place you can ever be – relying on Him. Walking in faith. Living in joy." (emphasis mine)

Go read the article: it is so well worthwhile!