Friday #2 in Calfornia

This afternoon I met up with some girlfriends from a very successful book club to which I used to belong about five years ago. It was composed of many professional editors--like me and my three lady friends today--and we had such passion for the books we read. I miss P.U.L.P. (People Under Literary Pressure)! Here is a photo of me with John, Cathleen (20 weeks pregnant with her first, a boy), Janeane with Emma (about 15 months), and Rebecca (mother of four-year-old twins who stayed home).
It was cute to watch Emma and John bumble around, playing near each other if not so much with each other.
Two little redheads!

Today I was able to peek into John's mouth and discovered a seventh tooth. Now he has four on top, three on the bottom.

I Miss My Daddy

Thursday in California

Dad and John playing this morning:
Mama and John in my mom's front yard:
John enjoying himself greatly as he explores the Great Outdoors, up close and personal--something he has been doing daily while here:

Learning to roll a ball with Aunt Erica (whom we will henceforth be calling Aunt Gramma, since she is my mom's identical twin):

Tonight, John indicated that he wanted to be spoon-fed from my dinner. He ate some rice, back beans, ranchero sauce, and guacamole! When he was thirsty, he pointed to his water glass.

Wednesday in California

Today I enjoyed visiting my dad at his office and our having lunch at Togo's, which is a great submarine shop not found in Georgia. I have to go back again because there are two sandwiches there that I love and I want to eat both of them while I am here!

In the evening, Aunt Erica and I visited longtime family friend Bill and his kids.
John really enjoyed tapping on the piano and making music.

We had some great excitement around here today. In the afternoon, I was eating a snack of yogurt in the kitchen, holding John on my hip. John began pointing to the yogurt: he often points to food but then won't eat it when offered. With no hope, I offered him some yogurt on a spoon. The first two tries he wouldn't take it, but he kept pointing, and on the third try, he accepted the spoon and ate the yogurt! Then he ate a second dab of yogurt!

That would have been enough excitement for one day, but there's more. At the end of dinner at Bill's, I was sitting at the table with John on my lap when we were served pumpkin pie. I began eating mine when John began pointing. I thought, "Yeah right, you're not going to eat this." Still, I offered him some pie on my fork and he ate it! In fact, he ate nearly ten bites of pie! If he pointed and I offered him my fork, he ate, but if I offered the fork without his pointing, he refused to open his mouth (and I've learned in the past six months just how tight a baby can clamp his lips shut).

One thing that has me thinking is that when John ate solids twice today, by spoon no less, he was in my arms or on my lap, eating from my foods. I held him on my lap while eating all meals for the first six months of his life and that is where he was when he began diving for my plate. But once he hit six months old and was heavier and could sit up, I began using his booster seat and trying to feed him in a more formal way across his plastic tray. I really have seen his interest in food dropping. I do always serve him what we're eating and I even make sure he sees me serve it from my plate to his plastic tray . . . but maybe he would behave differently if I brought him back onto my lap? I don't really want to do that because he weighs about 23 pounds, is a wiggle worm, and makes a big mess (which would fall onto me). However, this hypothesis certainly merits experimentation!

Tuesday in California

This morning, Aunt Erica and I walked to the nearby grocery store for a few last-minute items for our belated Thanksgiving dinner (also in honor of Mom and Neil's nineteenth wedding anniversary and John's upcoming first birthday).
John playing with the television remote control on Mom's bed:

Thanksgiving dinner:
John's birthday pumpkin pie:

John picked suspiciously at his pie and whipped cream and did not eat any. Are any of us surprised?

John loved the book and three balls he received!

Katherine's Current Reading: I just finished The Children's Blizzard by David Laskin (2004), which I enjoyed on so many levels: the genealogical research, the history, the meteorology explained, and stories of the American prairie, from which my mother's family hales. Reading about the immigrant experience and the blizzard of January 12, 1888, will give you a nice vaccination against self-pitying at least for a day or two!

Now I have begun The Diary of a Country Priest by Georges Bernanos (1937).

Sunday-Monday in California

John enjoyed reading his new book, Squirrel Says Thank You, with my stepdad. It's a darling book and, of course, I want to buy John the whole series.
On Monday I visited my sister at her new duplex where my three-and-a-half year-old niece Maddie was such a sweet cousin to John.
Maddie has a very friendly cat, Ojo, who came right up to John for snuggles.
John is excited to return and play again with his big cousin Maddie!

Saturday-Sunday in California

On Saturday, I visited with Mom and Neil before going to the neighborhood park with my dad. John had great fun playing with the leaves and practicing his pincer grasp with the tree's berries. Unfortunately, John was ready for his nap so was mostly spacey instead of his giggly self.

Today I went to Mass at my beloved old parish. One fun aspect of visiting every six months or so is seeing the parish children in six-month snapshots. They grow so fast!

After Mass and visiting the priest and my friend Tish, I visited Dad et al. for fresh bagels with cream cheese and my dad's fabulous homemade pomegranate jelly. There poor John had his first blood-drawing injury.

I knew this day would come, but it was a bit eerie how it happened. John was toddling around the living room quite confidently and I was shadowing him since we were in a house not baby proofed (as the "baby" there is now a teenager!). I was just telling the folks that it is interesting to watch John's cycle: every time he learns a new gross motor skill, he gets clumsy again and has more accidents. But I still haven't seen him draw blood and I sure will hate when that happens . . .

In that very moment, John tripped and fell mouth-first into the coffee table. He bounced backward and fell, banging the back of his head on the wood floor. When he made contact with the table, his lower tooth bit his lower lip and his upper tooth bit the skin beneath his lip (above his chin).

I couldn't see what was what in the following moments because his little mouth was covered in blood. I was so worried he'd driven a tooth into his gum or cut himself so that he would need stitches. But once I got the blood wiped away long enough to survey the damage, I could see all would be well. After about two minutes, John was nursing and, after about five minutes, he was smiling and happily chewing on a wooden coaster, even though the blood was still trickling.

It would have happened someday and could have happened anywhere, but it sure was eerie that I was talking about it the very moment it occurred. I shouldn't tempt the devil!

Welcome Aboard

We made it to California! As I had hoped, the airport on the Friday after Thanksgiving was deserted, so the two hours we spent at the gate was an overly cautious precaution. Here you can see me laden with a 53-pound suitcase, the car seat, a backpack, a diaper bag, and John. I was so grateful for Chris getting a gate pass and waiting with me till the plane departed.
The flight was the best yet. John was able to sit on my lap and both entertain himself and be entertained. He was fascinated to watch out the window at the trucks and baggage handlers buzzing on the ground. I praised God for our invention of individual television screens on the back of each seat as those entertained John for some time. We read books and played with toys, but John's favorite toy were the $2 earphones I hopefully bought for watching a movie (ha ha). There were periods of crying, including one for about 45 minutes, which got our neighboring 3- and 4-year-old sisters upset. They tried to console John with their stuffed puppy but only made him scared on top of being angry. I must say that I did watch the final two hours and eleven minutes of the five-hour flight tick by, minute by minute, on the flight monitoring screen. But we made it and John didn't even cry on the car ride to my mom and stepdad's house.

John's sleep was pretty rough. After being asleep for maybe half an hour, John woke up next to me screaming in terror. It wasn't pain and definitely seemed like fear crying. He cried inconsolably for 30 minutes, gasping deep breaths and weeping big teardrops. I did everything I knew but ultimately I think John cried himself to exhaustion. I wondered if it could be a night terror in a baby this young, but he did seem aware and knew that I was there, so his behavior did not have the sleep walking character of a true night terror. Can babies this young have nightmares? Why would he be so upset? He certainly doesn't seem to care when he awakens in new places with me, such as hotels. Any moms are welcome to chime in with illumination.

I brought an 8x11" photo of Chris and pasted it up for John. Upon waking, John was so excited to see the photo. He kept patting it, pointing at Chris' face, smiling, and saying "Daddy!" This went on for five minutes. Absolutely darling!

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving!

We enjoyed a lovely Thanksgiving dinner at Chris' parents home along with about 15 other people.

One of the children there was Masha, daughter of family friends, who is three weeks older than John. It was sweet to watch them, perhaps not play with each other, but play near each other.
Since I will be out of town with John on his actual birthday, we took advantage of the family gathering to celebrate John's upcoming first birthday. Sadly, the light in the room was a bit dim, so while the still photographs came out bright enough, the video we took is nearly black. On the bright side (ha ha), John has two more upcoming family birthday parties, so I will capture better video tape next time.

John did not seem to notice any hubbub surrounding himself. He did disintegrate the yellow cupcakes with chocolate frosting which I baked with love, but he didn't exactly eat them. He put them in his mouth, mouthed the crumbs, but didn't swallow much.

Travel Alert: John and I will be in California visiting my family for the next two weeks, so I probably will not be posting much to the blog. Please pray for my travels as I dread being stuck on a five-hour flight with an angry baby.

Secret Beauty Regimine

It is a little known secret of the ancient Egyptians that polenta makes a fine hair pomade, eyelash extender, and skin emollient.

Into Great Noise

This post is a slight play on the words of the title of a movie that we ... ummm... I mean... *I* recently watched, Into Great Silence. My wife would have loved to have watched it with me, however, thanks to the many interruptions from our son John, she was only able to watch bits and pieces of it.


It is a truly fascinating documentary about the everyday lives of Carthusian monks of the Grande Chartreuse, high in a remote corner of the French Alps (Chartreuse Mountains). This documentary demonstrates the power of contemplative prayer accompanied by silence. If you are interested, this movie just became available on Netflix, so I bet it is generally available elsewhere as well.

I joked with Katherine that she should film a documentary about the vocation of motherhood and the power of contemplative prayer accompanied by never ending noise. ... and she could call the documentary, Into Great Noise.

Really though I am in awe of the many daily sacrifices and redemptive sufferings bore by my wife through the laborious care of my son. I would stack her prayers up against these monks any day.

My Adventuresome Boy

I moved John's tricycle into the living room because he's shown a lot of interest in it. After I took this photo I was amazed to watch John accurately and carefully dismount. I was right there ready to catch him, but he did it all by himself. He put his right foot down on the blue frame, then lifted his left leg over the seat and onto the ground, all the while holding firmly onto the handles until he was sure footed on the carpet, at which point he toddled away. I was left sitting there with my mouth gaping open.

Here we see Daddy and John looking at what we call his "baby book" because it is filled with pictures of babies. John had just fallen and hurt himself, so was crying with big fat tears and everything. Chris showed him the baby book, which caused John to smile through his tears. Daddy even pointed out to him the photo of the baby crying. (I think if you click on the photo you can see a fat tear on John's cheek.)

This afternoon John brought me a live ladybug which he caught in the house. I put it in my palm and John kept pointing at it.

Today I counted off in steps how far I watched John walk by himself before stumbling. He walked 54 feet (while chasing the cats)! He just walks wherever he wants now!

I ask you, where did my baby go and who is this little boy who (sort of) rides a tricycle and catches bugs to show me? Thank goodness for moments in my day when John falls on his head and cries to remind me that he's still my baby, even if boyhood is on the horizon . . .

All Things Old

All Things Old Are New Again . . . I have discovered a new use for my pouch-style sling, the Hotsling, which I tried using when John was a newborn. At the time, he hated to be held in the cradle style, which I later learned was because of his reflux, so I gave up using the Hotsling. Now John is much older and has a new passion for watching me cook. If I don't hold him while I cook, he stands in the kitchen, on his tippy-toes on my feet, his fingertips hanging onto the counter while he cries. I think because he is older and has better cognition he understands I'm doing very interesting things up there where he can't see. Well, John can't see much of my cooking when he's on my back in the Ergo and I don't like wearing the Maya Wrap with its tail around my gas stove top. Yesterday I tried wearing John on my hip in the Hotsling while cooking and vacuuming and it worked beautifully! I'm going to reinstate this sling. Indeed, I might even pull out my adjustable, fleece pouch-sling for winter! I have learned over the last 11 months that I keep moving through the various slings I own as John's abilities, positions, and needs change. None have gone to waste! (See, honey, I told you I needed all these slings . . . ;)

Now that John is walking so well and with such speed, I can report that it is a new motherly joy to have him almost run from across the living room, his arms outstretched like Frankenstein, squealing with delight, so that he can fall into my arms and kiss my lips with one of his sloppy, open-mouthed baby kisses.

John Meets the Squirrels

John discovered the squirrels who eat bird seed off our back deck. He was transfixed . . .



. . . and made some great hooting sounds at the unphased rodents.








In the evening, Daddy and John played a fun game in which John would not allow Daddy to put down a wooden animal without John knocking it away. (The film is pretty dark.)

Still My Baby

On Friday we had some landscaping done. Our landscaper installed a planting around an ugly sewer drain we have in the backyard and he cut down a badly located tree. I took John outside thinking a boy would enjoy watching men with chainsaws and a tree falling down. I didn't realize that John is still more baby than boy, as he burst into hysterical fearful tears as soon as he heard the chainsaw. Once I got him calmed down indoors, he watched with interest from the safety of the window.

He's Truly Walking Now

John likes to find little hiding places where he reads his books and babbles to himself. I have not caught it on video successfully because he is well aware of the video camera and stops making cute noises.

We think John is old enough and Mama is also starting to be ready, so today I took some baby steps toward getting some alone time. First I jogged on the treadmill while John napped and Chris listened via the baby monitor, and when I finished Chris took John for a walk around the block while I stayed home! John was fine and I was fine, which is just how we all wanted it.

Speaking of baby steps, John is really walking now. In the last four days, he transitioned quickly from the tottering steps he's been taking for weeks to fully walking. He'll confidently walk across a room. Even if there is furniture right there, he does not cruise along it but walks by himself. It's amazing!

Lying on the Couch Is Safer

Teach me to ever go outdoors! This week I've been trying to institute a new routine of taking a stroller walk around the neighborhood after John wakes from his afternoon nap. Today I was feeling really lazy and the sky was looking oh-so slightly grey, as if it might rain (although it was about 75 degrees), so I decided that John and I would just play on the front lawn. I think I've only done that with him once before and that was when he couldn't even roll over. (I am such a bad mom!)

So, we toodle outdoors and are sitting on the front lawn playing with leaves when my neighbor Ginny steps outside her front door. Apparently only minutes before an armed man had robbed the bank one mile down the road and was now loose on foot, being pursued by police and their dogs! Phone calls were being placed to everyone in our neighborhood to move inside and lock their doors. So, that's just what John and I did! And all this while Chris was in an airplane at 40,000 feet, not due home for hours. Teach me to ever leave the safety of my home . . .

Of course, maybe it was God watching over me that made me too lazy to take my walk around the neighborhood where perhaps I wouldn't have received the warning from my neighbor at all.

Today I caught some (not very good) video clips of John walking . . .

. . . and clapping!

Meanwhile, John bonked his head on the bookshelf and I think is growing his first goose egg as we speak (although he is now happily playing). I'll keep you posted if anything else interesting happens!

Public Service Announcement

As if a commonsensical parent would need another reason . . . do not allow your baby to play with the alarm clock because then he might turn on the alarm, re-set it for 5:45 a.m., and turn the volume up to the maximum. Then when you and he wake up to the sounds of a rock concert, he will refuse to go back to sleep even though you feel like you've been run over by a truck because it is so early in the morning and you've had a horrible night's sleep, as always.

Crafty as a Cat

And the boy gets ever smarter.

We have a cheap baby gate to block John from going down the basement steps. We actually place it at least six inches above the ground so that my old, fat cat Missy can squeeze beneath it instead of leaping over it. Today John figured out that he, too, can squeeze under it.

John is walking more and more. For the first time, today John walked "out into space" instead of leaving the safety of one piece of furniture while aiming for another piece of furniture. Once he walked across the kitchen and once across the living room. It was amazing to watch! I'll have to try to catch more video.

In food news, I can no longer deny it: John likes goldfish crackers. Out of desperation, I began offering them to him last week and he really likes them. He ate five or six of them at dinner tonight, which is more quantity than he's eaten of anything ever. Why, oh why, does he have to like fat and salt so much, like his mama does?!

We're Not Quite the Marines

. . . but Mothers do a whole lot by 9:00 a.m.! This morning by 8:47, I have:

Changed John's overnight diaper and dressed him,
Then changed a poopy diaper,
Folded a load of clean laundry,
Washed a load of cloth diapers and bleached the diaper pail,
Read and wrote emails,
Organized some calendar matters,
Got John unstuck from between the window, the chair, and the BED (baby entertainment device),

Dressed myself, did hair and makeup,
Put away clean dishes,
Offered John breakfast (Joe's Os), which he refused,
Ate breakfast myself while reading a magazine,
Washed breakfast dishes,
Fed the cats,
Captured Missy the cat and single-handedly gave her her liquid antibiotics,
Emptied all the trash cans in the house,
Freshened the water in my bouquet of flowers (thanks, Chris!),
Nursed John three times,
Got John down for his morning nap, and
Updated this blog.

And I am merely a mother of one little baby! There are mothers of bigger broods who are doing so much more than me this and every morning. I salute you, Mamas!

Put Your Shirt On, Man!

I've instructed John that when he's a grown-up mowing the front yard, he needs to keep his shirt on!
I was enjoying myself at the computer and John was quietly enjoying himself in the corner, reading "Who Says Quack?" Ahhhh . . . bliss!

John is eating ever so slightly more these days and not gagging often. Tonight he enjoyed orzo pasta flavored with sundried tomatoes, kalamata olives, and soy sausage. You can imagine what the kitchen floor looked like after a baby, having free reign with orzo pasta, got done with it! A few days ago, I tried spoon-feeding John apple sauce to test once again how he does both with spoons and pureed food. He immediately started gagging loudly. He even gagged when I put apple sauce on his tray and let him feed himself with his fingers.

Random question: Courtney, are you out there? (Not my sister-in-law, but my CAF friend Courtney!) I haven't seen you comment in a while . . .

Saint Mary's Basilica in Phoenix Arizona

On a recent business trip to Phoenix I spotted a very beautiful Catholic Basilica down the street from my hotel, so I thought I would share.



St. Mary's Basilica is the oldest Catholic Church in Phoenix and was built around 1915. I walked over to the church and found it to be open. I went inside and was amazed by the beauty inside. The nave of the basilica was adorned with traditional stained glass...



...and life sized statuary, including a very nice Pietà near the opening.



And, thanks be to God, the good Franciscans in charge of this treasure have rejected most of the shameful modernist architectural changes of the last 40 years. The altar rail and the high altar are still intact.



These attached photos include some taken by me on my cell phone camera and the higher quality ones were from their web site.

"The Business of Being Born"

John looking dashing before Mass:
This afternoon, John escorted me to a movie. Unfortunately, as handsome as this young man may be, he isn't a very good date. At best, he squawked happily (too loudly) in the theatre and at worst he cried. Yet every time I walked into the lobby, he was quiet again! Here are photos of my "date" on the university campus where the movie was shown:
John is showing me a leaf he found. His latest thing is that he holds an item out for me, expecting me to kiss it.

I would like to recommend that everyone make the effort to see The Business of Being Born. Local groups are offering limited previews, which is what I attended. The film will be released in January, but only in New York, Los Angeles, and San Francisco. It will be available on Netflix in February . . . however, you will have to get in line because I'm adding it to my queue now! Even if you think you know all there is about birth, even if you're done having your babies, please, I think everyone--and especially every woman--should see this documentary! (Forewarning: This movie contains a lot of nudity in the context of birthing.)

In a rare moment of exposing self-pity on this blog, I'll admit that I am very disappointed to have missed as much of the movie as I did, what with spending most of my time in the lobby with John. (Chris was supposed to come with me and watch John in the lobby, but a business engagement arose that Chris absolutely had to attend and precluded him from coming to the movie.) I believe that first-time motherhood is deadly in a St. Paul dying-to-yourself kind of way. This year has been one full of the death throes of my ego and self-focus. Chris and I have made certain parenting choices which are not convenient for us but which we think are better for John. We think John is too young to be left with a sitter and, although he'd probably do fine alone with his Daddy now, I still haven't been able to leave him with Chris for more than about 15 minutes without feeling anxious about being apart from my son. So, while this was "just a movie," it is only being shown once, it is on a subject about which I'm passionate, and this was the first "luxurious" thing I've tried to do for myself in 11 months (343 days to be exact) . . . yet I couldn't even have an hour and half to relax, as is the mother's lot. John is getting older and soon won't need me as much in a 24/7, immediately present, providing-all-his-nutrients kind of way. I certainly count my blessings that having a child has helped me learn to shed as much of my selfishness as I have (and I have a long way to go) because there's no way I could have done so without a baby to force me. All right, pity party is concluded!